"It is six A.M., and I am working. I am absentminded, reckless, heedless of social obligations, etc. It is as it must be. The tire goes flat, the tooth falls out, there will be a hundred meals without mustard. The poem gets written. I have wrestled with the angel and I am stained with light and I have no shame. Neither do I have guilt. My responsibility is not to the ordinary or the timely. It does not include mustard, or teeth. It does not extend to the lost button, or the beans in the pot. My loyalty is to the inner vision, whenever and howsoever it may arrive. If I have a meeting with you at three o’clock, rejoice if I am late. Rejoice even more if I do not arrive at all.
There is no other way work of artistic worth can be done. And the occasional success, to the striver, is worth everything. The most regretful people on earth are those who felt the call to creative work, who felt their own creative power restive and uprising, and gave to it neither power nor time.
Perhaps your dream is not mediocrity at all. I don’t think we’re meant for constantly striving for more. Maybe your dream is your definition of success. Why let someone else define that for you? The only one who needs to be proud of you at the end of each day is you.
True and I’ve done that work but also…mediocre isn’t a bad word to me. Whatever people attribute to it is interesting bc I don’t want to be successful all the time, I want to make space for all the things I’m mediocre in until I’m completely content. Call me lazy. Mediocre. All those names ♥️ (I know you’re not calling me those, I’m talking about the larger world)
Call me lazy. Call me crazy, hazy, high. Call me selfish, a shellfish, brainless, worthless. Call me weird, wacky faithless. Call me a woman. call me too feminine. Call me girly, sissy, a dirty hippie. In the end it makes no difference. In the end I do what I want. In the end I’ll choose love. I’ll choose peace. I’ll choose freedom.
Contentment is so hard to get to…and then once there, to maintain. I would love nothing more than to travel the world and write about it, but that is likely not in the cards for me, unless I win the lottery. So I just try to be happy with where I am…trusting it is where I am supposed to be. I’ve resigned myself to a life of labor, because, well…it’s expensive to be alive and single in America. C’est la vie.
Let us find our people. Let build our dreams. Create these communities where rest is possible. Where relaxation, meditation, mindfulness, kindness is normal. Let’s believe in it. Speak about it. Find ways to realize it. The possibilities are endless. There is no one stopping us. That’s just your own internalized oppression. ❤️
Whoa! “That’s just your own internalized oppression.” Struck a chord that is still vibrating. I know that mean voice is there, whose it is/was and try to stifle it, but sometimes…
This really speaks to me. I've never had strong ambitions for a career. I dream of being in community and rest with other gentle souls, and of a day where the Scripture you quoted is no longer thrown in our faces.
Literally yes to all of this. Dreaming of going to work feels so…yikes to me? I will work because I have to. I try to at least have jobs that don’t demoralize me but…these aren’t my dreams
Beautiful as always. I feel this deeply too. I wonder if there's a distinction to be made between work and labour, because so much of what I dream of might look like an act of labour to others. Teaching and caring for my kids, creating and sharing music, maintaining and improving my house, gardening and cooking big meals, reading deeply and writing lots, engaging with other thinkers.
But of course also lots of leisure, naps whenever I want, good drinks often, and sitting with my favorite people doing nothing, and no deadlines, and never because I have too or else the paycheck stops, but just because I want to and I love to.
I think there is a lot more thinking for me to do on this, a quick search of work vs labor led me to a lot more to read, so thank you!
Thank you for these thoughts. I don’t dream of labor or work honestly, but I know our world gives us those categories. My wonder is “what would I do if I was freed from the constraints of this world?” I would write I would love I would be so free to explore without fear. Thank you for these nuances
I really appreciate your musings here, Jacob. I feel like I am blessed because so much of my labor is life-giving. I love my Counseling practice – setting other people free – leading retreats. How blessed am I that I get paid to do the things that bring me so much energy! And yet, I noticed that I’m on the verge of burnout. I’ve been overdoing an overextending, so I need a corrective. There is a middle path here for me yet to be discovered.
Thank you! I've been on both ends of that. Right now all my work is totally energy draining and only exists to provide for the family. I'm also course correcting. Writing here, focusing on music again, and being more involved in a faith community have been lacking until recently, but now they're quickly at odds with the needs of a family. Such is life! So we dream.
I love this! I relate to this so much, and if I'm honest, I dream the same dream. Even the details you shared feel so true and similar to how I wish to spend my time. I also wanted to be a marine biologist as a child!
I am struck deeply by your words. “The world is someone’s dream, whether we like it or not.” This gives me so much agency. I need to repeat this. Why not my dream? Why doesn’t my dream get to have a voice in the world? Why am I expanding energy trying to submit to someone else’s version of the dream, rather than proudly declaring and manifesting mine? Why can’t I create a world where the universe spontaneously brings lovers together and helps us find our people magically, without any effort or striving? Why can’t I create a world where people aren’t lonely, but are living in life-giving communities? Of course I can!
I miss the days of my naïveté. I was happier before I became so goddam aware.
I feel for my sons who never seemed to have the same period of naïveté. They have always been hopelessly aware and there are so many horrors to be aware of.
Mary Oliver on the Zen of Creative Artistry:
"It is six A.M., and I am working. I am absentminded, reckless, heedless of social obligations, etc. It is as it must be. The tire goes flat, the tooth falls out, there will be a hundred meals without mustard. The poem gets written. I have wrestled with the angel and I am stained with light and I have no shame. Neither do I have guilt. My responsibility is not to the ordinary or the timely. It does not include mustard, or teeth. It does not extend to the lost button, or the beans in the pot. My loyalty is to the inner vision, whenever and howsoever it may arrive. If I have a meeting with you at three o’clock, rejoice if I am late. Rejoice even more if I do not arrive at all.
There is no other way work of artistic worth can be done. And the occasional success, to the striver, is worth everything. The most regretful people on earth are those who felt the call to creative work, who felt their own creative power restive and uprising, and gave to it neither power nor time.
Thank you 🙏🏾
Wow. You have no idea how much I needed to read that. Thank you. 🙏🏽💛
“My loyalty is to the inner vision and howsoever it may arrive.” That is SUCH a Profound and valuable departure for me. Wow.
Wow. You have no idea how much I needed to read that. Thank you. 🙏🏽💛
“I dream of being free.” A whole word
….a human being,
not a human doing….
Perhaps your dream is not mediocrity at all. I don’t think we’re meant for constantly striving for more. Maybe your dream is your definition of success. Why let someone else define that for you? The only one who needs to be proud of you at the end of each day is you.
True and I’ve done that work but also…mediocre isn’t a bad word to me. Whatever people attribute to it is interesting bc I don’t want to be successful all the time, I want to make space for all the things I’m mediocre in until I’m completely content. Call me lazy. Mediocre. All those names ♥️ (I know you’re not calling me those, I’m talking about the larger world)
Call me lazy. Call me crazy, hazy, high. Call me selfish, a shellfish, brainless, worthless. Call me weird, wacky faithless. Call me a woman. call me too feminine. Call me girly, sissy, a dirty hippie. In the end it makes no difference. In the end I do what I want. In the end I’ll choose love. I’ll choose peace. I’ll choose freedom.
Contentment is so hard to get to…and then once there, to maintain. I would love nothing more than to travel the world and write about it, but that is likely not in the cards for me, unless I win the lottery. So I just try to be happy with where I am…trusting it is where I am supposed to be. I’ve resigned myself to a life of labor, because, well…it’s expensive to be alive and single in America. C’est la vie.
You’re so right
Let us find our people. Let build our dreams. Create these communities where rest is possible. Where relaxation, meditation, mindfulness, kindness is normal. Let’s believe in it. Speak about it. Find ways to realize it. The possibilities are endless. There is no one stopping us. That’s just your own internalized oppression. ❤️
Yes. As Eliud Kipchoge says “no human is limited”
Whoa! “That’s just your own internalized oppression.” Struck a chord that is still vibrating. I know that mean voice is there, whose it is/was and try to stifle it, but sometimes…
“In my wildest dreams, I am “lazy.”” THIS. And love that you put lazy in quotes because that word doesn’t exist in my dreams either.
Yes!
This really speaks to me. I've never had strong ambitions for a career. I dream of being in community and rest with other gentle souls, and of a day where the Scripture you quoted is no longer thrown in our faces.
Literally yes to all of this. Dreaming of going to work feels so…yikes to me? I will work because I have to. I try to at least have jobs that don’t demoralize me but…these aren’t my dreams
Beautiful as always. I feel this deeply too. I wonder if there's a distinction to be made between work and labour, because so much of what I dream of might look like an act of labour to others. Teaching and caring for my kids, creating and sharing music, maintaining and improving my house, gardening and cooking big meals, reading deeply and writing lots, engaging with other thinkers.
But of course also lots of leisure, naps whenever I want, good drinks often, and sitting with my favorite people doing nothing, and no deadlines, and never because I have too or else the paycheck stops, but just because I want to and I love to.
I think there is a lot more thinking for me to do on this, a quick search of work vs labor led me to a lot more to read, so thank you!
Thank you for these thoughts. I don’t dream of labor or work honestly, but I know our world gives us those categories. My wonder is “what would I do if I was freed from the constraints of this world?” I would write I would love I would be so free to explore without fear. Thank you for these nuances
I really appreciate your musings here, Jacob. I feel like I am blessed because so much of my labor is life-giving. I love my Counseling practice – setting other people free – leading retreats. How blessed am I that I get paid to do the things that bring me so much energy! And yet, I noticed that I’m on the verge of burnout. I’ve been overdoing an overextending, so I need a corrective. There is a middle path here for me yet to be discovered.
Thank you! I've been on both ends of that. Right now all my work is totally energy draining and only exists to provide for the family. I'm also course correcting. Writing here, focusing on music again, and being more involved in a faith community have been lacking until recently, but now they're quickly at odds with the needs of a family. Such is life! So we dream.
And by the way – I love your vision here. We share a similar vision, with the exception of the gardening. Are you single?
I love this! I relate to this so much, and if I'm honest, I dream the same dream. Even the details you shared feel so true and similar to how I wish to spend my time. I also wanted to be a marine biologist as a child!
Whoa! I hear you
I enjoy your candid and thoughtful musings. I’m curious about your broken heart 💔
I love this! I dream the same dream.
Beautiful dreams
I am struck deeply by your words. “The world is someone’s dream, whether we like it or not.” This gives me so much agency. I need to repeat this. Why not my dream? Why doesn’t my dream get to have a voice in the world? Why am I expanding energy trying to submit to someone else’s version of the dream, rather than proudly declaring and manifesting mine? Why can’t I create a world where the universe spontaneously brings lovers together and helps us find our people magically, without any effort or striving? Why can’t I create a world where people aren’t lonely, but are living in life-giving communities? Of course I can!
Wow ♥️
This is poetry brother ❤️
The wholesomeness in this beautiful dream of ours. I love it here. Thank you for the confirmation and light Robert!
😊
I feel this in my soul. I have the same dream.
wow. great minds think alike
I miss the days of my naïveté. I was happier before I became so goddam aware.
I feel for my sons who never seemed to have the same period of naïveté. They have always been hopelessly aware and there are so many horrors to be aware of.
Thank you for sharing your dream.
Thank you for sharing too
Robert, your wildest dreams sound amazing, I love them all!! Gorgeous piece and a dreamy, lovely photo to go with it. Thank you for sharing!! XO
🥹🥹🥹 thank you