The societal pull toward romance over friendship is something I’ve been reflecting on recently. My tunnel-vision focus on romance definitely damaged my friendships in my younger years, but I’m grateful to be able to refocus now. Thanks for these reflections
I believe that to function as a loving human being, one must first be loved. We come into this world a blank slate, totally dependent on our caretaker parents for all our physical and emotional needs.
We need at least one other human to love us. That being said, without this love early on, we cannot learn to love others, manage self control, and put our own needs on temporary hold for the benefit of the other. For some, these lessons are learned early on , but for others, their recovery is achieved mostly by being accepted, listened to and supported by a therapist, friend, sponsor, foster parent or other capable of unconditional love. The hole in a hearts is healed through intense work over a number of years. Often, this love is sought from a romantic partner with disatrous results. Love is the balm for a damaged heart.
I felt this. Good friendships are so underrated in this world. There is nothing like having people who check on you, encourage you, and pray for you. I know the pain of thinking I would be friends with someone for a long time and then having the rug snatched out from underneath me. Thanks for sharing and being vulnerable. Beautiful pictures!
I was talking to one of my friends of more than 20 years. We have a rich repository of remembrances because we’ve weathered so much together. And she has literally saved my life. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for her.
Friendship is so sacred. Friendship is also a form of loving commitment. It is woefully underrated (maybe because it’s harder to commodify and profit from?).
I am so glad we’re friends, Robert.🫂 You are a safe place.
whewww I'm so glad. those 20 year friendships are such a treasure. and you said a whole word with "maybe because it's harder to commodify and profit from" and I'm going to be thinking about that all day. And I'm so glad we are friends! it is such a gift and I don't take it for granted. There are billions of people in this country and finding friends can seem like a mixture of luck, blessings, and random chance.
we love a good friendship. ❤️ my friends are legit my lifeline. after God, they're the humans i wouldn't want to be on these side of earth without! such a beautiful tribute. cheers to all the great friendships out here!
So very good, so very important, Robert. Thank you for sharing your heart. I can’t speak for everyone, but I can say that I never tire of heartfelt posts, of friendship/love posts, of being human and all its messiness. Keep doing what you are doing, please!
I appreciate this post so much. I'm so glad you had people to hold you up when you needed them. Friendship really is everything to me. In the past I noticed how some would slowly disappear after becoming partnered. It's reassuring to know that there are people that still care to pour into their friendships if and when they decide to partner.
Robert, your post really spoke to me. Thank you. My own most recent Substack post is about how beautiful it is when people we're in relationship with assure us -- in words, not just actions -- of the solidity of our connection. So we are thinking along the same lines I guess. I love how you expressed these ideas;; I always appreciate what you have to say!
The societal pull toward romance over friendship is something I’ve been reflecting on recently. My tunnel-vision focus on romance definitely damaged my friendships in my younger years, but I’m grateful to be able to refocus now. Thanks for these reflections
I had a similar pull and that…damaged me in my younger years. Thank you for resonating
I believe that to function as a loving human being, one must first be loved. We come into this world a blank slate, totally dependent on our caretaker parents for all our physical and emotional needs.
We need at least one other human to love us. That being said, without this love early on, we cannot learn to love others, manage self control, and put our own needs on temporary hold for the benefit of the other. For some, these lessons are learned early on , but for others, their recovery is achieved mostly by being accepted, listened to and supported by a therapist, friend, sponsor, foster parent or other capable of unconditional love. The hole in a hearts is healed through intense work over a number of years. Often, this love is sought from a romantic partner with disatrous results. Love is the balm for a damaged heart.
This is a phenomenal post, walking away from this feeling a lot and very grateful.
dang thanks so much bruh. truly.
I felt this. Good friendships are so underrated in this world. There is nothing like having people who check on you, encourage you, and pray for you. I know the pain of thinking I would be friends with someone for a long time and then having the rug snatched out from underneath me. Thanks for sharing and being vulnerable. Beautiful pictures!
I was talking to one of my friends of more than 20 years. We have a rich repository of remembrances because we’ve weathered so much together. And she has literally saved my life. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for her.
Friendship is so sacred. Friendship is also a form of loving commitment. It is woefully underrated (maybe because it’s harder to commodify and profit from?).
I am so glad we’re friends, Robert.🫂 You are a safe place.
whewww I'm so glad. those 20 year friendships are such a treasure. and you said a whole word with "maybe because it's harder to commodify and profit from" and I'm going to be thinking about that all day. And I'm so glad we are friends! it is such a gift and I don't take it for granted. There are billions of people in this country and finding friends can seem like a mixture of luck, blessings, and random chance.
we love a good friendship. ❤️ my friends are legit my lifeline. after God, they're the humans i wouldn't want to be on these side of earth without! such a beautiful tribute. cheers to all the great friendships out here!
yessss!
So very good, so very important, Robert. Thank you for sharing your heart. I can’t speak for everyone, but I can say that I never tire of heartfelt posts, of friendship/love posts, of being human and all its messiness. Keep doing what you are doing, please!
I appreciate this post so much. I'm so glad you had people to hold you up when you needed them. Friendship really is everything to me. In the past I noticed how some would slowly disappear after becoming partnered. It's reassuring to know that there are people that still care to pour into their friendships if and when they decide to partner.
Beautiful pics!
every single one of them: beautiful souls :)
Your story sounds familiar to mines. I can relate to everything. Im still a working progress
Friendship has saved me more times than I can count and it is the reason I survived the worst year of my life. Love this beautiful reflection!
Robert, your post really spoke to me. Thank you. My own most recent Substack post is about how beautiful it is when people we're in relationship with assure us -- in words, not just actions -- of the solidity of our connection. So we are thinking along the same lines I guess. I love how you expressed these ideas;; I always appreciate what you have to say!
Thank you for being my friend 🫂
I'm so grateful for you bro.
You and your words are a blessing brother.
Grateful to call you a friend to have found you on my own journey of being and becoming ❤️
This pictures though… 😍🥹
as I was putting them in I was like dang how is everyone so good looking haha
It’s true though!